Ghosts
by serenitymeimei
Summary: Post S3. Something is missing in their lives and neither of them can figure out what it is.


**Disclaimer:** If Fringe were mine, there'd be less science and a lot more smooching... just sayin'. (see profile for a REAL disclaimer)

**A/N:** Written for the fourth annual International Day of Femslash! Also, this was a prompt- Astrid/Olivia, loneliness- but, for the life of me, I can't remember where I found it, lol. Whoops!

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><p>Astrid was lonely.<p>

That by itself was normal enough, her longtime girlfriend Erin had dumped her a few months ago and she'd spent a lot of time by herself since then, but when she spotted Olivia sitting at her favorite bar on their only day off, she knew that she was experiencing something different. It was an odd feeling she'd had in the pit of her stomach for nearly a week now, ever since Ellis Island from over Here and There merged into one space she'd felt like something was missing- something important- and she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

"Hey, Liv," she said, dropping a casual hand on the older agent's shoulder, ignoring the fact that she'd never taken the liberty of shortening Olivia's name before, but it had felt right so she'd done it anyway, "I wasn't expecting to run into you here."

The blonde smiled wearily and threw back the last bit of her whiskey, gesturing toward the bar tender for two more, "I needed to get out for a while."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," she tentatively took a sip from the tumbler that was placed in front of her, grimacing at the taste. Astrid wasn't about to say no to a free drink, and if it got her drunk quicker, she wasn't going to argue.

They sat there for nearly forty five minutes in companionable silence, close enough to caution any potential suitors from approaching them, but far enough apart that their arms just barely brushed each other whenever they moved. Astrid took her time, working her way through two more glasses of liquor as she listened to the old fashioned jukebox in the corner, thankful for the way that it warmed her body, radiating slowly from her stomach outward. The combination eased the tension within her, melting the worry away until it was only a little niggling in the background.

"Can I ask you a question, Olivia?"

Astrid felt her tense and almost immediately regretted it, but she pushed on anyway. She had to know.

" Have you felt... _off_ lately?"

Olivia's brow furrowed, "Off?"

"Yeah, like you've forgotten to turn off your stove or left the water running for a bath and you just can't remember what's so important, but you know that something's wrong."

There was a hint of recognition in her eyes, Astrid was sure that she saw it. It was brief, a flicker of gold brightening the green hue of her iris, followed by the tightening of her jaw and a heavy sigh. For a moment, she silently cheered. She'd been right. It didn't last long, though.

"When did you first notice it?" Olivia asked cautiously.

Taking a deep breath, Astrid purposely pressed one of her knees into the other woman's thigh as she turned to properly face her, getting just a little bit closer so that their conversation wouldn't be overheard, "Just after we left New York."

Olivia frowned, "I didn't feel it until the next day. Waking up alone seemed- wierd, like I hadn't done it in a long time. That can't be right though, I haven't dated anyone since John."

"When I took Walter home that night I stayed long make and eat dinner with him, but set the table for three," she felt her throat tighten with emotion, but couldn't explain its presence, "I don't even know why I did it. It's been a while since you've stayed over for a meal and usually it's just the two of us..."

She felt Olivia's hand rest on her leg, shivering when she squeezed it, "Maybe it's just stress?"

Astrid immediately frowned, one delicate eyebrow raised as if to say, _'Are you kidding me?'_

"Right," Olivia sighed, her thumb tracing little circles just to the side of Astrid's kneecap as if she didn't realize she was doing it, "Fringe Division. Silly me."

A few moments passed.

"Should we tell Walter?"

"No."

"Why not?" Astrid asked, knowing full well that they'd eventually have to speak with him about it sooner or later.

"I just-" pausing, Olivia seemed to deflate, her mind working overtime to try and find the right words, "I feel like if we tell him now, it's only going to make things worse. I don't want to upset him until we get some idea of what's going on."

Upset him? Taking a moment to mull it over, Astrid realized that Olivia was right. When she saw what she'd done, three plates laying on the dining room table that night, she'd rushed to hide it, ashamed like she'd stepped out of turn at Catholic school and was about to feel the smack of a ruler across the tops of her hands. She hadn't understood why she'd felt that way at the time, but after hearing Olivia's reasoning, she was almost certain that it was because she hadn't wanted Walter to get upset by seeing her mistake. Sure, she'd messed up loads of times before, but that had felt different somehow. More significant. Now, it made sense.

Reaching down, Astrid covered Olivia's hand with her own, taking comfort in the determined look on her face, "Where do we start?"

"From the beginning."

**End.**


End file.
